emo fifth entry



Got 6 duties for this month.. 2 Guards and 4 COS duties. 1 more guard duty left. How i wish i dun have to go back. So tiring. 6 duties but only clear 5 extras. 2 more extras to clear next year!!! Emotional downfall. Sigh.. 頑張って!!!

emo fourth entry



Have been pretty tough and busy this period of time.. As usual, busy with the a/skote. There's a major check coming up in janaury and it's stressing me up!! Work early, plus OT, missed lunch, missed dinner and get gastric after that.. Our A/skote is Ranked "A" previously. If the rank drop, you'll get extrasssSSSss for it.

74 more days to ORD, then minus 22days for the weekends which left with 52days!!! Can't wait to ORD!!! I think i'll miss most of them, especially jianxuan!! The way he talk, the way he laugh, the way he bitchssSS and the way he quarrel with uncle micheal.. We'll just keep laughing non-stop.. It's pretty fun to hang with them. WAIT!!! Why am i talking like my ORD date is freaking near?? Still got a Major check to handle!!! -.- lolx..

Talking about check..There's this RollyPolly guy that keeps trying to find fault for my A/skote!!! It's damn irritating!!! The cos called on Christmas Eve and complain to me that the DOS for that day which is ROLLYPOLLY came to check my A/skote like 23:40 something?? PM?? Come on!! It's Christmas Eve night and his trying to find fault at everyone?? Check every single office, turn the campguards 3 times in a row and find fault at my a/skote again and again and again!!! Can't he just have a break or something?? Argh...

emo third entry



Just got back from burnei this afternoon.. Although my job isn't as tough as compared to the rest but, i felt a little exhausted. If you ask me what do i gain from this trip, i'll tell you 7 extra duties & a fine of 16bucks for the stuff that's missing in my office. And if you ask me how do i felt about this trip, i'll tell you it's pretty much of a good experience.. BUT.. I doubt that the rest would wanna step into that place ever again.

Well, pretty much stuff happened through out this whole trip. Firstly, my office (which is the A/SKOTE) lost some stuff. Secondly, poeple pushing Responsibility. Thirdly, backstabbing.. and last but not least which involved some friendship bonding among friends..

The bonding stuff is pretty much a pain in the ass.. It seems like i'm the cause of breakin the bonding among them. Just becuz of someone's behaviour that make us feel irritated and all this happens. Maybe they feels the same way as i did, proberly i'm the one at fault. if they know what's happening, i'm sure everything won't be as bad as now. It just hurt pretty much to see when all of them are so serparated now, where everyone used to be so close.. How i wish my bonding with them is as close like them, but i guess i've failed. I do treat them as friends but i guess i'm just a extra steppin in and out of their life 5days a week for this 2years.

Maybe i should be return being a life in HQ suckin up with the White Mazda like what the other HQ personnals are doing all this while.. Sigh.. It's so sickening. White Mazda can be pretty nice at times but his like a vocalno that will blast off anytime..

emo second entry



Open armskote, take over, issue arms, receive arms, paperwork'ssss, get scolded, get f*** and got punish by our white mazda devil, clean weapons, maintain weapons... doing the same stuff over and over again for 5-6 days a week!!! It's so BORING & STRESSFUL with all the checks & stuffs.

Why am i there where i could be an artist in MDC acting, singing & dancing away with my dancing feet.. Passes the first audition but failed the second last year becuz of my stupid Pes B and my unit!!!

Dance is what i do.. I wanna be performer, being a professional in acting/singing & in dance especially.. I know that i didn't really score for my singing & acting, but i'll train, do and hit everything with my best shot. I don't mind all the tough training and challenges that i gotta go through training my ass off, cuz what i'll be heading for is what i really wanna achevied and pursure on in the near future.. and in fact i love it!! Well.. then to be tortured by my beloved superious..

Really regret that i didn't keng and downgrade my Pes during my 1st year of National Service. With an OC that's hypocrite and a CSM that's weird, bias, and never satisfied with our job..

Can my life get any better? 6plus more months to ORD.. Will MDC still accept me? Can MDC please drag and pull me in i begged.. Sigh..

emo first entry

emo first entry



The winds knocks on the window over the room as small as me..
Twiling stars filing the room with love..
Telling me don't be hurt caressing my wound so gently embracing me to sleep..
Too hurt for my legs to walk, eyes so blurry with tears..
Before love never meant for me..
I will keep smiling if it's short like those stars embroidered in my eyes..
I will love you forever..